It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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