There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
