so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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