I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
