I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
