you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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