I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
