Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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