I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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