I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
