Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Randomize
