Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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