Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
