all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Randomize
