His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize