Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
