Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
