please come you make the beer taste better
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
