cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
