I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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