mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
