If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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