I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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