I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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