I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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