Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
