When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
