Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
You're a waste of cheezeits
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
