she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
