I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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