hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
