I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
