Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
i was born a porn star she said
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I have aggressive nipples.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
