I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
