First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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