I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
