No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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