Do you still have your period?
I am puke
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
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