That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
