my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
