dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
