I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
smell my finger.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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