Small penises have feelings too.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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