You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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