# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
