I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
