Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Randomize
