Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
