that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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