i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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